Letting Her Fly

Fulton Middle School had its Back to School night last night, and for the first time, I really got to see what my daughter will be doing this year. She has been in school for four weeks, and she's doing great, but I really had no idea what challenges she was facing each and every day. I came home in awe of my 11-year-old and what she has done in this first month at a new school and with more challenging curriculum.

1. She has figured out how to use her locker.

2. She has devised a system for keeping her classes and schedule straight so she knows what books and folders are needed and when throughout the day.

3. She has navigated the PE scene, where she can dress out for PE and then back to her regular clothes with relative ease and virtually no embarrassment.

4. She has charted a course so that she can make it from the front of the school where her English and Social Studies classes are to the portables in the way back of the school for math without being late.

5. She has found ways to have fun and laugh despite having to carry the heaviest backpack in the world.

6. She has bounced back from an incident in science where she forgot her assignment and received a zero.

7. She has made some new acquaintances and has enjoyed getting to know familiar faces better.

8. She has learned to check the school email system every night so that she can double-check what assignments are due and compare that information to what she wrote in her notebook.

9. She has chosen a wardrobe and hairstyle that reflect her personal style and make her feel good about herself.

10. She has been patient with me as I flit around her not knowing how to help and wanting to make her transition to this new school easy and painless.

After hearing what her teachers have in store for her this year, I am thrilled for my daughter. For the first time ever, she is being asked to use the brain God gave her and is being taught amazing things. She will not have an easy time, but I was impressed with what the teachers want these kids to learn and the creative and innovative projects that await them. My only concern is what do I do now? How does my parenting style that involves so much protecting and shielding line up with my daughter's newfound joy and confidence?

All I can do is open my palms so that the little butterfly can see the open sky and watch in awe as the butterfly dances upon them before taking off. She stamps her tiny feet on my palms so that some of the dust from her wings shakes off and lands there. She'll know the spot to come back to. She'll recognize it. All I can do is send her soaring and watch how she uses the currents to fly higher or dodge danger. All I can do is hold my breath as the sun threatens to scorch her wings or the rain threatens to drive her down. All I can hope is that she'll alight safely in my palms again although I know that she'll never tolerate my palms closing over her. She's seen the sky; she knows how to fly now. I will have to find new ways to protect her that don't diminish her need or desire for the wind.